Hey, AI – leave sneezing panda alone!

Posted: December 14, 2025 | Author: | Filed under: Matters that Matter | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

I’m like you.

I too like scrolling through social media and finding clips of CCTV or candid camera of those videos.

You know the ones.

They feature the impossible trick shot, the extraordinary comedic coincidence, miraculous creativity – that make us want to watch again but also put down the phone and head outdoors into the real world.

I suppose, for all the sensational terms I’ve used above, the real definition is ‘hopeful’.

Everyone loves these videos.

You see them and you are reminded that life is actually pretty cool, maybe you’ll go for a walk.

Here’s the problem. AI is being used by living people.

That’s not to say that the deceased would make better use of it, but it is those currently living that are, as ever, the problem.

And they’re using AI.

To do what?

It’s not just their taxes, their spreadsheets, or their wedding speeches.

They’re using it to fake those moments of real life that are the romantic and true chaos that remind us of it’s unruly splendour.

I’m talking about, dear reader, the sneezing panda.

When scrolling social media, you may have noticed an increase in attempts at this type of reality. AI attempts at the glorious moments that make us smile and love the world.

In December 2025, the AI in use is still not capable in application to falsify such important moments as these (I’d also very much so like to include the Aussie chap punching a kangaroo) fluidly or effectively.

My worry is that it won’t be long till they can.

And when that time comes, how can I believe that those lovely little moments are real any more?

Those moments, which I personally consider to be the entire point of social media and why at some point in the 20th Century we began filming each other constantly, are the tickety-boo examples of what screens are for.

It’s not emailing (don’t do it – it’s uncouth).

It’s not online files involving finances (yuck).

It’s not web-dating (less-so but still yuck).

It’s not even sharing government secrets with San Marino (sure they’re a tiny country, but they want to know some secrets too).

It is funny cats (you know this already)

It is Gangnam Style (which seems quite AI but wonderfully, isn’t).

It is The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny (Mr Rogers is the greatest thing – confirmed).

It is the Dramatic Chipmunk, Chocolate Rain, Keyboard Cat, Charlie Bit My Finger, and that other one I can’t recall the name of….

But it’s not AI’s fault.

It’s people, as ever.

People start wars, people spread plagues, and people misuse AI to upset the proper flow of funny cat videos that ensured my faith in life persists like life itself.

This is the same issue that is the centre about most people’s concerns about AI – it’s not the Ai itself: it’s some person, being very regrettable, using it as they shouldn’t.

But what can I do about it?

Well, I’m going to use AI a little less often. I’ve taken to using AI to create thumbnails for this blog.

From now on, you can expect some truly awful drawings, made using my children’s crayons, that I will photograph and upload to accompany every equally awful blog on this site.

I’m doing it for the sneezing panda, you, and myself.

Apologies for that.

Species defining imperfections on the way.

Sam

Social media: nothing has changed. But we must.

Posted: December 19, 2024 | Author: | Filed under: Matters that Matter | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

About a year ago (when would have been a good time to share publish this blog) – there was a great deal made of ‘X’ (then, and forever really, ‘Twitter’) becoming a platform permitting right-wing content, bullying and dangerous topics.

I myself didn’t notice any difference, the only real impact being that WordPress would no-longer be so easily shareable to the X site.

Perhaps, it depends on where on the X site you’re looking. I wasn’t really looking at right-wing, bullying or dangerous things, so that might be why. I just desperately scrawling through it to see who was sharing blogs about what they had for breakfast.

But there was no change I could tell.

I did notice, however, that there was something still a major factor of social media. As I spent hours scrolling and scrolling through the content on X, Instagram, and Facebook, it eventually dawned on me that social media is a profound waste of time.

And I’ve only got so much time, and I need it to write about my breakfast (today, toast. Tomorrow, the world!).

Hasn’t it always been a waste of time? Perhaps a cool waste of time? Especially X?

In my life, Facebook was the original place to waste time: posting pointless updates featuring the latest and most hip abbreviations, sharing photos of people literally just sitting around with a variety of hand gestures, and ‘liking’ pages ranging from an esoteric movie (Ergo: “Hey, I’m esoteric, like this movie.“) to (and I don’t know what to call this): a page titled “Hey it’s snowing! Brilliant!“.

Photos continued to be shared on Facebook through my 20s, and now I can’t delete the damn thing because it is the sole location of my kid’s baby photos. Mine too, probably.

Twitter was meant to be the means by which my extraordinary blog would be shared with soon-to-be adoring fans, as well as a foundation for further research into the absurdly interesting concepts that I could soon write about.

But then, I was ‘followed’ by a local carpet shop in my home town and I realised its proclivity for wasted time was confirmed. They still follow-me, and they too don’t seem any more right-wing than usual (likely due to going out-of-business several years ago).

Instagram is brilliant, the best way to share images and video. A great place for a blog, surely.

Otherwise, every other social media seems to be the same.

TikTok only seems to differ from Instagram as it is a means of People’s Republic of China’s subversion of Western stability, whilst Instagram is less-so. Instagram is best at short videos, YouTube long ones, TikTok pro-sedition ones.

Rest assured, what we had for breakfast can be duly shared on each of these.

My point is that the whilst there’s focus of each social media, the fact is they’re all broadly a waste of time.

Yes, I’m sure you too have heard of people who met their one-true love on Facebook, or are making money from Instagram, or even using the platform to share truly inspiring content. But you’re not, you didn’t and you likely won’t.

You did, however, waste your time. And not in the right way.

Remember that time on Facebook when there was a specific scenario benefiting you with brilliant life-experience a great tale to tell? No, of course not. Exactly the same as when you were on Twitter and nothing proceeded to happen there either.

It’s better to have a bad day in bad weather than to waste time on social media.

That way, you can either make good use of time or waste it too, but it’ll be real-life. Which is useful either way. More social media – less you.

Social media is not an experience.

We’re programmed to find ways to use and waste time as humans. Look at me writing this blog – a far more productive way to waste time.

Ultimately, social media hasn’t changed. It didn’t need to. Neither did we, but we do now.

Waste time in real life, not online.

Sam