I am sitting here, trying to remember what articles I read now. Thankfully it was the Daily Star, so there were lots of pictures.
Pictures are good memory joggers, especially as they make words standout in the first place, and the Daily Star nails this, mainly through images of massive interest and zero relevance. Like this one:
Its a beaver. Doesn’t really need the words actually, though I do like the “Hey“.
“Hey” indeed.
The Daily Star might be what we’d hand to the extraterrestrials to give them an idea of what our focus really is, or we’d roll it up to bop them on the head (nearest equivalent) to shoo them out of our atmosphere.
Either way, we’d still say “Hey”.
If they ever come at all, but in the meanwhile….we’ve clouds.
We’re just not dangerous enough yet. Or cool enough either. I’m doing my bit, but you should all really be a bit more dangerous.
Perhaps like the warrior in the garden, rather than the gardener in a war. But I’m frankly more interested in a dangerous gardner.
With big, purple and suggestive-as-hell vegetables. Mainly purple.
It’s nice to have a goal which accommodates climate change, since the UK is going to have no aims to avoid it.
And, purple vegetables. Very ‘in-vogue’. Very ‘end-times’.
It’s getting hotter. Leave the heating off, especially if you’re in the pub.
I like a cold pub. It’s a chance to wear your coat indoors, as though you’re at ski-resort in South London (great place to drink and ski but not actually the latter).
November, and the previous month, are a time in the UK in which people wear poppies.
Small and large, plastic and linen, attached through button holes and by safety pins and needles.
I don’t think you’re allowed on TV unless you wear a poppy.
The reason for this is to make a personal statement in public concerning your opinions on World War 1 and 2. If you wear a poppy, then you are stating that you are ‘against’ World War 1 and 2, and that you are commemorating the lost lives in those wars.
“World War One? I’m against it.”
There is nothing in so much wrong with this. It has two wonderful benefits- such as that if you buy a poppy from the official charity, then proceeds proceed to the families of those that have died in warzones in more recent conflicts.
Another benefit, one that I much appreciate, is that the poppies are ubiquitous. And as such- children, being naturally curious about their environment, ask what they represent. Therefore, the answer of “To commemorate the lives of those lost in the world wars” comes forth, and the subject of these astounding events in human history are breached unto the child- and so they are aware.
This is great- telling children about it is crucial to their outlook and to their understanding.
If we don’t tell children, then the point of everything is entirely lost. It is the one moral that we all aspire to.
However, there is a negative side to this that swerves away from the path of attempting to change the world following two explosions of evil.
If you don’t wear a poppy- then by definition (by many that wear the poppy) you don’t respect the dead lost in the wars.
And if you don’t respect the dead- then you’re the bad guy.
Maybe you’re the kind of person to start a war. Perhaps you enjoy a nice war- and you think bullets are the way forward. The kind of person that only eats off of a bayonet, and if not then you want nothing to do with it.
I knew it- you’re a violent one. One of those people that wants nothing more than to annex your neighbour and distinctly not stop there.
I can tell that your favourite metaphors revolve around penetrating others with revoltingly blunt objects at high speeds. You struggle making these metaphors, but you eventually get it out. Then people move away from you. I can tell this about you.
I can tell by your lack of poppy.
So, perhaps you have given a tremendous amount to charities around the world in an effort to relieve the effects of war. And maybe you have educated a multitude of children about the history of the world wars.
But you haven’t got a poppy…so…fuck you. As it turns out- you’re Hitler.
You are a traitor, you are not a patriot, and you are a disrespectful fool only interested in saving 20 pence and not risking getting pricked by a safety pin.
And you punch babies.
And you’re a work-shy lout.
You’re probably not a God-fearing Christian. I bet you’re not even from this country.
You’re what’s wrong with this country. Something will happen to you soon.
Essentially, by choosing not to wear a poppy, for whatever reasons you have, the effect reminds me of being made to wear a yellow star.
You are not in uniform with the rest of the nation, you stand out and you are different. That’s why you’re fucked.
Maybe if you’d had respect enough to do what everyone else did- you wouldn’t be getting frowned upon like this.
Maybe it’s time you blended in. Perhaps we should all blend in.
Don’t forget- if you’re not blending in, then you’re a violent coward that kicks his breakfast to death and shits on every war-orphan you encounter, even if there’s no need for it.
So my suggestion is this: buy a poppy and wear it before you get singled out and bullied. Because that’s what people do. Because they’re too fucking stupid to think before they do.
One thing I must make plain here- not all that wear a poppy have this opinion. A great deal of people simply wish to grieve the dead, promote peace, educate the young, and all-round try to help the planet a little before they leave it and that is all. They don’t want to hate because others are different. I love these people. They think. But I fear it has become so that people now simply use the poppy, rather than respect its meaning.
To summarise, wear a poppy if you wish. Good for you. Charity is charity and educating children is, as I said, essential.
And, to summarise just a little more, if you don’t wear a poppy, then fine. Good for you. You may be contributing aid and effort stopping the woes around the world born and left from war, and you may play your part in ensuring that the next generation is aware of the horror and the tragedy that these vile events have played in very recent human history. It happened to our parent’s parents.
It will happen to your children’s children.
But, remember this- as this is the point that should be most prominent in our moral thinking following the events of WW2.
Think, before you join in. Never be afraid to be apart from the pack, for whatever reason. Bully no one for being different, however different you may feel them to be. The Jews were different, so they paid. The followers of the Nazi’s did not think, and so we all paid.
For too many, this is not about remembrance. It is about trying to prove something to others about themselves. This is something that comes from a lack of self to actually offer, so this visage is seized upon and thrown forward as though it is of actual worth- staining the true meaning of displaying this symbol by associating it with idiocy and fear.
I will not be wearing a poppy, for now at least. And you’ll be able to tell how much I care by looking for what is missing from my chest. I will not be wearing a poppy to show respect to those that were bullied and made ‘missing’ thanks to those that refused to think. I refuse to wear a poppy, for those who were given no choice but to wear a yellow star.
And there we have it.
This has been quite a long and intense article, so I thought I’d end on a lighter note.
I think a good slogan for a corporation would be: ‘NEVER FLACCID’. It needn’t be a company with anything to do with Viagra. It’s a state of mind. And, yes, a state of penis too.
The Lateral Column 